Thug Life

It started with this awesome baby bag/robe thing we have. An offhand gangsta comment from P precipitated into a staged photo shoot of S by C. This is how S works the camera. Kinda makes you wonder how soon he'll be asking for gin with his juice.

It's time for introductions

Well, it's been a while since we've made time to document our lives and a fair bit has changed.  There are new jobs, different sheep, more cows, better landscaping and the worst drought in years.  Oh, and we've also started a family.

As for the introductions, World Wide Web, meet Simon Peter Ortman,  Simon Peter Ortman, meet everyone.

Below are a few snapshots of the birthing experience we had. It's kind of a long story, but the synopsis is that we had intended on a natural water birth at a hospital in SF, and after a long, exhausting labor we were thrilled to be surrounded by excellent facilities and people that enabled us to have a safe and expedient C-Section. It wasn't how we drew it up on paper, but we believe we made a great team that made the best decisions possible given the realities and ended up with a rediculously cute little boy and a joyous and exhausted set of parents.

Early on C labored by walking around, shaking her hips and... reading.

More intense labor on the birthing ball with some key counter pressure from P.

The water felt great and the rose was a nice visual touch.

Even going into major surgery, C had a sense of humor.

The proud Papa, with more than a few sniffles of joy and relief as he gets to meet Simon for the first time.

The joy is contageous and Simon is loving his mom.

In surgical recovery Simon had an accute sense of what his first job should be.

Rediculously cute.

P works on tickling S with the chest hair -- everybody loves it.

Father and Son size comparison.

The first bath was a bit of a shock, but it felt good to get clean.

C is looking good, happy and exceptionally well accessorized.

If you're interested in even more photos, they're available via Picasa/G+.

Feline vs. Amphibian

So, last night we had a snake in the back entry, and tonight when we came home, Dash, or "-", didn't greet us at the door as she normally does pleading to go outside.  We knew something was askew, and what we found challenged C's ethical code.  Note, that she loves our cat, but also loves frogs...a lot.

The dilemma: Allow Dash to continue playing with the trophy she discovered in the basement, a small toad, or save the poor things soul.  C rationalized that releasing the damaged toad out into the cold wouldn't save it's life anyway.  So, we allowed Dash to play with, and then eat her bed lunch.

Now I'm going to have to check my shoes!

We just returned from an evening spent frightening the youth of our church (no, not a hell house, just a scavenger hunt with us hiding and jumping out at opportune moments) when P noticed something slightly amiss in our entry.


Namely, there was a snake present.

Granted, it was a garter snake and it was trapped while trying to enter the space under the door jam and was thus quite helpless, but it was a little bit disconcerting.

The snake was clearly alive and wedged in and totally stuck.  A brief but fairly animated discussion took place as to whether - should be allowed to see/eat the live snake.  C held the pro-natural-order-of-things position, and P the anti-bloody-stub-of-a-snake-by-our-back-door position.



In the end P went to get a screwdriver to provide un-wedging support for the snake and C rounded up -.  The screwdriver was used, but the snake could not be backed up and eventually slithered under the door jam.  Meanwhile, once the snake slithered away, - became very interested in attacking the screwdriver, and quickly forgot about the snake.



End result, we know we do not sleep with a homicidal kitten at our feet, but we're left wondering that since the snake was trapped while trying to leave our home, where and how did it enter? And, perhaps most importantly, do snakes climb stairs?

A new addition to the family

It's been a while since we've posted and that's in part because we were busy preparing for a new addition to our family. This may come as a bit of a surprise, but we finally broke down and got a kitten. She's adorable and has already proven to be a lover of our laps. She has already been litter box trained and uses her scratching block accordingly, leaving our furniture alone (knock on wood).

Settling on a name for the little kitten has been a bit of a challenge for us. She has a sibling named "Ears" resulting from ear hair that is out of control, but in all other ways looks quite similar. P then thought it might be funny to call the her "Ne" (pronounced "knee") as both an acronym for "Not Ears" and in honor of Monty Python's "Knights Who Say Ni." This was deemed officially not funny by several people. Then, the name "-" (pronounced "dash") was found to be fairly funny by P. This comes from a name which we heard of while living in Elkhart county: "La-a" (pronounced "Ladasha"). Remember folks, don't let your - be silent. Other names we've considered is Acorn, Turtle, or Mousse. C thinks she looks like a delicious turtle cheesecake. Sadly, we're still using "kitten" as her primary name, alternate suggestions welcome.

Currently, we're hoping that she can be trained to herd sheep, but admittedly, that's coming along a bit slower than we had hoped.

These photos document early life on the parent's farm, then coming home with us on that fateful Sunday in September and a couple taken at home. Don't worry, this won't become yet another blog of adorable kitten photos, we promise. Let it be known, we also believe promises are meant to be broken.

Pied Piper

When you envision a cattle drive, you might not know exactly what we mean. Likely it envisions romantic visions of horseback riding, river crossings and lassos. Those visions are definitely romantic, but not accurate the Ortman farm. One of our little secrets is that our cows are trained (somewhat) to come when we call. While this isn't too unusual, we're a bit biased and think our cows are pretty awesome and generally respond very well to our calls of "Come Boss" which has been distorted to a non-word call of "Kah-boss"

The proof, as they say is in the pudding (apologies for the pretty rough/loud audio, this is the best I could do holding my own phone):

This video is a bit of lie. What's not shown is the group effort involved in the cattle drive. While the cows and calves are clearly following P when he calls and leads, C was also making sure the stragglers were coming along in a timely manor and P's dad was making sure the path ahead was ready for the cattle.

She's got the country thing down

Recently it was noted that C seems like she's a "real country girl." Coming from a real farmer, not me, that was intended, and understood I should mention, as a genuine compliment. I think this photo only adds credence to that statement.

C: As I am not one for the spot light, I have been using my editorial rights to not publish this entry-notice the comfortable cool weather spring attire. However, there has been a lull in new content....more to come soon.